Title of Book: A LIST OF OFFENCES
Genre: Women’s Fiction
Author: Dilruba Z. Ara
Website: www.dilrubazara.com
Publisher: CreateSpace
PURCHASE A LIST OF OFFENCES HERE
SUMMARY:
Daria, the heroine of the book is born under unusual circumstances
that cause the people of her small village to gossip; yet as she grows
she becomes an intelligent, sensitive and spiritual beauty that one
feels is destined for a perfect life. After a flood, a boy is found on
the bank of her river. Daria’s parents adopt the boy, and Daria
befriends him. As they grow Daria begins to inhabit Mizan’s dreams and
thoughts, but a sudden meeting with anglophile Ali Baba brings
everything crashing down around Daria. She forgets her upbringing and
falls madly in love with him and after her hasty wedding, she moves to
Baba Lodge and is brought into the suffocating life of Ali Baba and his
family.
Here she lives a life unloved and psychologically abused until she
gets pregnant. Now she begins to hope that finally her potential for
love, luck and happiness will be realised through her new-born child.
Yet relations between Daria and her in-laws deteriorate further. Daria
finds herself torn between the religious mandate of Islam to stay with
and obey her husband and the call of her intellect and instincts to flee
and forge a different life for her daughter.
FIRST CHAPTER
A Bottle of River Water
A whisper went round the little village of Gulab Ganga during the
days around Daria’s birth. It said, “Jharna Begum, Daria’s Ammu, defied
God when she refused to give up the thought of having a daughter.” She
had her four sons, three miscarriages and one stillborn daughter. But
yet she couldn’t accept the idea of not having a daughter in her lap.
When the most trusted doctor in the neighbourhood advised her against
trying to get pregnant, she, like many in her dilemma, decided to get
help from supernatural sources. The road there would be reached by means
of a man, who claimed to be a Pir, a spiritual person. He lived on the
outskirts of Gulab Ganga. A good many people went to him to catch cattle
thieves and poachers, a good many went to get better crops, a good many
wished to be cured of some incurable diseases, and a good many wished
for a male heir to carry on the family name. And on rare occasions,
someone would actually call on him to get a female child; to light up a
family with only male offspring. And this was partly true in the case of
Jharna Begum, Daria’s Ammu, but mainly it was because she felt half a
woman without a daughter.
It was exactly one year before Daria’s birth that Jharna Begum woke
up on one occasion at a time that was neither morning nor night; night’s
blackness was slowly oozing away at the touch of first light. A soft
and transparent time, that could be called morning-night. She washed
herself, took a bath, said her morning prayers, read some verses in the
holy Quran. Then on an empty stomach, wrapped a shawl round her
shoulders, opened the safe and took out a bundle of notes. Some fresh
and crisp. Some dirty and limp. She put the money in her bag and sidled
out of the room. Azad Chaudhury, her husband, was away on business and
that suited her very well, because he wouldn’t have approved of her
going to meet a Pir, whose credibility was dubious. The rest of the
family was asleep. She took a deep breath, crossed the front veranda and
stepped down onto the ground along the left gable of the house. She
continued to the stable that was further off in the same direction.
There she met the servant boy Gafur and the housemaid Gulabi. She told
Gafur to keep guard on the house for an hour. After a moment, she was
seated in the coach with Gulabi and the coachman, Abdullah, on her way
to the Pir, the saint, who was to serve as a link between her and the
supernatural powers.
It was a humid morning. The ground was covered with dew. On the
horizon white haze rolled softly, blurring the contours and colours of
everything. Beyond that the river sparkled in the first glow of the
morning sun and some fishermen cast their nets in it; fishnets shimmered
in the air like dewy cobwebs before falling into the water, but the
haze blocked the view. The wagon picked its way in between the chequered
boards of rice-fields. Sometimes it rattled; sometimes it thudded on
the bumpy earthen road. Jharna Begum sat erect, her lips moving. Most
probably reciting holy verses. Alongside the road some peasants were
already at work. Some bent over the water-covered field to set rice
plants, and some ploughed; peasant feet submerged up to the ankles in
the muddy water; peasant hands disappearing under the water to
transplant rice seedlings.
The Pir (said to be) lived in a small hut on the outskirts of the
village. It was made of mud and bamboo canes with a sloping hay roof and
stood in the middle of beaten ground surrounded by sprawling bamboo
clusters that were partially veiled by the grey mist. From behind the
hut an old mango tree spread its branches over the low roof. Haze
lingered among the foliage of this tree as well, but just above the roof
Jharna Begum could discern some baby mangoes. Grey-green, round and
wet, silently growing out of hardness. A skinny hen walked on the patch
of ground in front of the hut pecking at whatever it could find; a few
dragonflies sat lazily on a tuft of withered grass-straws. A breeze
blew, carrying a scent of water and river. The mango leaves hummed. The
bamboo leaves whispered. Gulabi remained standing on the spot. Jharna
Begum took a deep breath and approached the hut.
The room was murky in spite of the hurricane lamp that hung from the
ceiling. Soft shadows danced on the walls as the tongue of the flame
flickered inside the soot smeared glass. Major parts of the walls were
plastered with various pictures from the holy city of Mecca. High
stepping camels and Bedouins, dusty date trees around oases,
scalp-shorn-men — pilgrims-in-white, women — pilgrims-in-black, the
black holy stone and the white gathering around it. The only window was
covered with a drape. In one corner out of a small brass bowl rose a
fine stream of smoke; scents of sandalwood, camphor, incense and rose
essence. An earthy dampness hung in the room.
The Pir was seated on the floor on a mat. He received Jharna Begum
with due respect and asked her to settle down opposite him. She was
hesitant; nevertheless she obeyed him as though in a trance.
Perspiration gleamed above her lips, studded the tip of her nose, and
her forehead. It grew in her armpits and between the fold of her
breasts. A sweaty fear crawled down her back and she swallowed a lump of
saliva. Words pounded in her head, while her stomach was hard like a
tight fist. But she wouldn’t give in to her nervousness. So, gathering
up her courage, she began to talk. Her voice trembled, tongue dried out.
Words came out of her tense mouth; first staccato and then woven
together into meaningful sentences. The man murmured and nodded.
After half an hour when Jharna Begum took the coach home, the sun had
risen to a higher level in the sky. It was white. The haze had resolved
into a fluttering piece of transparent cloth. She put her chin on the
windowsill and looked out. Windblown ringlets danced on her temples. Her
eyes saw the pale green rice plants, the mud coloured peasants with
their mud coloured feet and hands under the muddy water, the tilting
wicker-hats on their heads, the pelvic zone of a cow that lifted its
tail to drop some dung, gleaming sun on the tails of diving kingfishers,
and the shimmering river beyond; but with her heart she saw a baby
girl. A baby girl in her arms. In her hands she held a green bottle. A
bottle filled with enchanted water. Water, which would help her to
mother a baby girl. Now she just had to ensure that one of her servants
collected natural water for her by pressing the brim of an earthen pot
against the stream of the river. Seven Thursdays she would bathe in that
water eked out with the enchanted water she now had in that tiny green
bottle in her hands. Imagine getting a baby girl! To get a baby at such
an age! Forty years! God, Allah, the almighty. At such an age one should
only wait for death to come. At such an age it was entirely legitimate
to die, it was a well-acknowledged die-able age. But instead she was
preparing to give life to a new human baby. A baby girl. Jharna Begum
felt a mysterious wave of contentment sweeping over her. While the
morning breeze, now crisp from the warming sun, fondled her face, she
smiled. Like a child who had found the very bottle with the genie. She
held the precious bottle tenderly. Azad Chaudhury was, of course, a
little bit worried about his wife’s sudden obsession with the matutinal
baths on Thursday mornings. But he decided to humour her. And therefore,
he even went to bed with her as per her wish after her ritual baths
with that magical water. They built and furnished a small room in the
furthest end of the dwelling. The rest of the family members were told
that Jharna Begum’s physical condition demanded total seclusion from
daily life. Initially Azad Chaudhury had thought it would be unnecessary
to build a new room only for seven Thursday mornings. But, soon, very
soon, he changed his mind. For it didn’t really take him too long to
realize that he enjoyed every second, every infinitesimal fraction of
each second he spent there together with his wife. In secret they called
this room ‘the love nest’ (even though the phrase sounded banal in
their experienced ears). Within the four walls of that nest after twenty
years of marriage they once again experienced the ecstasy of newly
found love.
On those warm, fairy tale like mornings Azad Chaudhury, propped
against the pillow, would look at his wife’s slender body and think that
he had never seen her like that before. He licked her feet, her soles,
her insteps, kissed her on her kneecaps, tickled her belly, felt the
perfect curves of her round shoulders against the cups of his large
palms, oiled her with coconut oil, and rubbed her gently. Her eyes would
darken, the world beyond the dark blue curtain on the window would
slowly brighten but inside they would be lost. She touched his hairy
stomach, tugged at his nipples, let her nails run up and down across his
body hair and create parallel lines like a farmer furrowing a land and
leaving plough marks. Both would have gooseflesh on their skin, his
Adam’s apple would move restlessly and she would swallow saliva. They
would fondle each other, taste each other’s secret smells and drown in
each other’s eyes. His warm palms against hers, his fingers intertwining
hers, the soles of her feet rubbing gently on the back of his feet they
would reach the climax. Later during the course of the day they would
recognise each other’s private smells in their nostrils, and they would
exchange furtive glances.
Considering all this passionate lovemaking, it was probably not a
miracle that Jharna Begum soon got pregnant. But with the realisation
both she and Azad Chaudhury reacted as though a miracle really had
happened. As though the genie really had escaped from the green bottle
to fulfil their dreams. They started to cry and laugh. They cried for a
moment, laughed a moment, hugged each other, cried again, licked each
other’s tears and lay down. They slept a while, woke for a while,
embraced each other, whispered soft words and fell asleep again. When
the pregnancy advanced, Azad Chaudhury saw to it that Jharna Begum was
not in want of anything. He heaped over her gifts and tenderness and
fulfilled all her strange whims, such as those which only suit a pregnant woman.
If she wished for hot peanuts with salt and pepper, she was served
that; if she longed for roasted green mangoes blended with crushed red
chillies she was given that too. If she craved for ripened tamarinds
those were also procured. One midnight she woke up and declared that she
must have grilled Ilsha fish, alias silver fish. Now this fish is
famous for its silvery scales, and when it comes to taste, it’s
absolutely delicious.
But, unfortunately, it was not the season for this fish. Still, early
the following morning Azad Chaudhury himself paid a visit to the nearby
fishing community. He held out a leather pouch filled with coins
(silvery and golden) and said that the one who was able to catch a
couple of Ilsha fish before the next dawn, would be rewarded with the
bag and its entire contents. The fish was caught, grilled and served on a
silver platter at dinner. The dish so suited Jharna Begum’s taste buds
that soon it became a permanent part of the family’s meals during the
rest of Jharna Begum’s pregnancy. She was contented, and into the
bargain a handful of fishermen got slightly richer than they had
bargained for.
The Neighbourhood Talked.
On winter evenings snuggling in homemade quilts the villagers huddled
around outdoor fires under the gaze of stars. They smoked hookahs, ate
grilled sweet potatoes and whispered tales. Witchy tales. Wintry tales.
Tales spiced with the chill of winter evening. Painted with the vibrant
colours of the fire and cinders in the middle of them. They fed the fire
with reeds and kindling that cracked and died in the flames, and they
fedtheir ravenous minds with fabulous tales about Jharna Begum and the
baby that was thriving in her belly. Before long it was heard that
Jharna Begum was obsessed with the fish dish because the man who had
given her the green bottle with the magical water, had proclaimed that
she would give birth to a girl with hair the colour of ‘silver fish’.
Some said she was carrying a mermaid, half-fish, half-human. Pregnant
women avoided the sight of her in fear that the very sight of her might
hamper the growth of the babies in their wombs. It was strange how one
strange rumour gave birth to another, stranger one. Some even claimed
that Jharna Begum really possessed the bottle with a genie. It was,
however, poor Gulabi who had to face all these torpedoes of vicious
remarks about Jharna Begum’s pregnancy. Whenever she showed herself
outside the house boundary she was attacked by the neighbouring women.
They relentlessly pestered her with ridiculous questions and soon she
started to complain about these gossips. Jharna Begum listened patiently
to her. But dismissed her anxiety with hearty laughter. Without
appearing to be condescending or angry she completely disregarded the
complaints and left Gulabi speechless, and as usual continued to send
the servant boy, Gafur, to the fishermen to get the fish every morning. The fish was prepared and cooked under her
supervision. When she ate it, she ate it with such relish that soon
Gulabi and others realised that it was no use trying to change her
craving.
The four boys — Hadi, Jami, Sami and Sadi — who were between eight
and twelve years old, had not yet the slightest idea why their father no
longer took his usual trips to the other parts of the country. He was
always at home. Only they continued as usual. They went to school, read
the holy Quran every Thursday, did their home-work, played with one
another, fought with one another, and when angry, railed on one another.
Gulabi saw to it that their nails were clean, hair oiled, hands washed;
that they had milk warm from the cow for breakfast, and that they turned in on time.
Daria was born on a bright day. It was towards the end of May, just
before the onset of the rainy season. The time was precisely twelve
o’clock. The sun was hot and cruel. The sky was absolutely white and so
was the baby girl’s hair. It was white. Silvery white. Alarmingly white.
Very white. At the sight of the hair colour, a scream died in the
bewildered midwife’s chest and at the same time her bladder gave way,
making her thighs wet. The midwife’s face was glistening with tears, but
she was struck like a statue, as though fixed by the mesmeric eye of
calamity. Kneeling down between Jharna Begum’s legs, she held Daria’s
tiny body in her hands, her head bent over it, her hot urine collecting
under it, the navel cord still hanging loosely down the vagina of Jharna
Begum. The whole thing was something akin to a scene at an altar.
And Gulabi, who had been witnessing the scene with a hurricane lamp
poised in mid-air, took a while before she could even begin to grasp the
nature of the incident; the stench from the urine smelled old,
contaminating, of grief and troubles. Gulabi shuddered and gasped as the
true scandal of the incident swam into her consciousness. She stood
dumb-founded for fully two minutes before returning to her senses. But,
once out of her perplexity, she hastily placed the lamp on a bedside
table, bent down, cut the umbilical cord, and snatched Daria out of the
midwife’s baffled, rigid hands. It was then Daria gave her first cry,
relieving all others, and also shocking the midwife back to reality.
Gulabi cleaned Daria thoroughly, even her nostrils, before swaddling her in a soft piece of cloth to put her to her mother’s nipple, where
milk had already started to flow. And the midwife, soiled by her own
urine and the refuse from Jharna Begum’s uterus, withdrew to a corner.
Even in those days the dwelling house was two storeyed. The walls
were made of bricks and the flat roof of corrugated tin. The rooms stood
in a row one after another. Two deep verandas ran along the front and
rear side of both stories, and a wooden flight of stairs connected the
back veranda to the first floor. A small patch of land separated the
main house from the kitchen while on the front was a rather big patch of
land. There grew fruit and flowers, papayas, mangoes and jackfruits,
bananas and coconuts, tuberoses and jasmines, marigolds and land
lotuses. Today the flowers glimmered in the sunshine and it was
impossible to avoid the numbing sick-sweet aroma emitted by the sweating
jasmine flowers. The mango trees were filled with mango blossoms. The
boughs on the jackfruit trees bent under the weight of the fruits. The
sugar bananas, very yellow, waited expectantly to be harvested. Hot
green leaves sheltered the buzzing bees. Blue bottles
hummed. Crows and jackdaws feasted to fulfilment. It was a hot, humid and fruity atmosphere as in a green house.
The climate in the birth-chamber was somewhat cooler in comparison to
that of the outside world. The grey cemented floor and the bare white
walls were cool; the room was clinically clean just as a birth-chamber
should be. The doors and windows were closed making the room
half-shadowy. And to add to its clinical element it smelled of camphor,
incense and rose water. Daria’s Nanu (maternal grandmother) Salma Begum
and Fufu (paternal aunt) Fatima sat in one corner. They too had
temporarily lost their speech at the sight of the baby. But the child’s
scream readily brought them back to the present. And both of them began
to recite Quranic verses with such gravity that an outsider would easily
have mistaken the room to have been designed for mourning. Surely you
mourn for the deceased in a hospital room, and you rejoice for the
newborns. Today of all days Jharna Begum would have liked to rejoice at
her daughter’s arrival, she would have liked to sing the praises of God,
she would have liked to extol him boisterously, she would have liked to
thank him. But these two women turned the room into a mourning chamber,
they made the atmosphere heavy, gloomy. Unnecessarily sad. Was it
because of the poor midwife’s mishap? Was that the reason, Jharna Begum
wondered?
But it was only an accident. Or, was it because the child’s hair had
such a rare colour? Jharna Begum sighed. Strangely enough, she didn’t
feel any irritation but a feeling of familiar indifference. She knew
that it was no use trying to make others understand her feelings. In the
soft light of a hurricane lamp she looked tenderly at her daughter’s
swollen cheeks, the closed eyelids, the red mouth and two tiny nostrils.
Jharna Begum repeated with a contented voice: water-baby, water-baby.
Then she sighed again.
Having performed the Jummah prayers in the mosque, Azad Chaudhury had
just returned home together with the quartet, Hadi, Jami, Sami and
Sadi. It was Gulabi who was waiting anxiously for him on the veranda.
She told him about the newborn, took the prayer rug from his hands, and
ushered away the boys to a different room. Azad Chaudhury looked very
pleased and with a smile on his face he pushed opened the wooden door,
and stepped inside. He halted for a few seconds in the semi-darkened
room. As his eyes got used to the darkness he greeted his mother-in-law
and then turning towards Gulabi said, “Open the window shutters!”
His mother in-law, Salma Begum, stopped murmuring. And so did his
sister Fatima. There was a sudden silence. It took a while before Salma
Begum shrieked in her frail, shrill voice, “You can’t let midday wind
flow freely into a delivery room.”
Azad Chaudhury looked for a while at the old lady. His brown eyes
were soft and polite. Without attempting to dispute the old one, he
explained.
“Excuse me, Amma. But, I would like to see my daughter’s face in the daylight.” Salma Begum shook her head.
“Enough harm has already been done to the baby.”
“Like what?” Azad Chaudhury was surprised.
“The midwife…” Her words failed, she couldn’t bring herself to tell
her son-in-law about the mishap. It embarrassed her. Her fingers
clutched at the tasbhi in her hand.
Azad Chaudhury looked at the face of his mother-in-law, who looked beyond him. He then turned to Gulabi.
“What happened? What has the midwife done, Gulabi?”
“Abbaji…” Gulabi hesitated and then said, “nothing to worry about.
I’ve taken care of it. I’ve washed the baby. I’ve even cleaned her nostrils.”
“Nostrils!” Azad Chaudhury was even more puzzled.
“Yes, so that she shouldn’t remember the stench.”
“Stench of what?”
Gulabi was by now already regretting having said too much. She fell
quiet. Not knowing how to answer she looked helplessly at Salma Begum.
The old lady shook her head and then said, “You had better ask your
wife in private. As for the window, you may open it for a while. But
it’s no good for a newborn. Midday wind carries evil spirits.”
Azad Chaudhury nodded thoughtfully, all but satisfied with the
riddling answers. But he gave in, and once again asked Gulabi to open
the shutters. The two shutters were opened. A sparkling parallelogram of
sunlight fell on the floor. White walls became whiter. The cool floor
became warmer. Azad Chaudhury took two steps towards the bed. He bent
over it. There was suddenly that awkward silence again. Very silent.
Very tense. While the taut silence bounced against the four empty walls, Azad Chaudhury’s pupils widened, his spine hardened.
The child had violet eyes rimmed with black lashes, and she already
had a pair of eyebrows shaped like the wings of a soaring gull. Her
cheeks were chubby, smooth and fresh like any newborn. Her lips red as
ruby. But her hair was silvery white. Ever so white. White like the tops
of the Himalayas. Azad Chaudhury could think of nothing to say but
murmur prayers. On his shoulders he felt his mother-in-law’s deep
breaths, his sister’s attentive eyes. Unfamiliar thoughts were growing
like weeds in his brain. He shook his head. Something must have gone
wrong. Must have. A child can’t have silver hair. It’s not normal. Why?
Why? A curious sadness settled in his heart for the little creature
in his wife’s arms, his little daughter, his little princess, born out
of oneiric mornings. His eyes grew moist as he took up the girl and held
her close to his heart. His eyes met his wife’s. The sun reflected in
her eyes. She smiled.
“How are you?” he asked.
“Very well. Thank you!”
“Are you happy?”
“Why shouldn’t I be?”
He smiled, braving the pressure of the weeds that grew in his brain.
Hairy weeds, itchy weeds, poisonous weeds. All with long tentacles.
Frightening. She stretched out her arm. He took it, and squeezed it
hard.
Later the same afternoon he sent for Dr Nandi. Dr Nandi was as
puzzled as others were at the sight of the child’s hair colour. But
having checked the girl thoroughly he declared that it was a child, one
hundred percent normal. Meanwhile, Gulabi was ordered to take care of
the umbilical cord and the placenta. As instructed she dug everything
down in the garden, and set a jasmine plant on the top. Having performed
the task quickly, she returned to the room with some mustard oil in a
brass bowl, tidied up the bed, spread a large towel in between Jharna
Begum and the oilcloth under her, and then climbed up herself on the
bed. There, kneeling down beside Jharna Begum, she oiled her palms and
got hold of Jharna Begum’s belly. She held it tightly and at the same
time with a rhythmical movement began to press out the air that had
invaded the cavity from the afterbirth. Air came out of all possible
holes in Jharna Begum’s body, while she complained about Gulabi’s hard
grip.
Lots of Aaas and Uhuus! But, Gulabi proceeded in the same manner for
an hour everyday during a period of exactly forty days. That was the
time span taken by Jharna Begum to regain her flat and tight stomach so
that no one could any longer believe that this belly had in its time
accommodated a number of children.
This hot afternoon, when Dr Nandi had calmed Azad Chaudhury with his
diagnosis, Azad Chaudhury sat down for a while and took a few deep
breaths. With each breath he uprooted some of the twisting weeds in his
brain and finally decided that it was time he demonstrated his
gratefulness for being gifted with a daughter. He sent one of the men-
servants to buy some rashgullahas, cheese balls drowned in syrup, from
the village sweet-stall. When the man returned he ordered him to take
the two finest cockerels from the pen and fill an earthen pot with some
of the rashgullahas. He collected two sets of clothing and sent all
these to the Pir Sahib, who had provided Jharna Begum with the green
bottle with enchanted water.
Jharna Begum emerged from the delivery room — it was already evening —
with the child in her arms, defying the rest of the women in the
family, who advised her to remain there for forty days. They said she
shouldn’t leave that room till her bleeding ceased and her uterus shrunk
to its original size, the size of a goose egg. But Jharna Begum paid no
heed to her concerned relatives. In the kitchen the old cook had
already started to prepare chicken soup, an unspiced dish with horned
fish and plantains and other so-called delicacies that normally are used
to tempt an ill woman in childbed in this part of the world. Inside the
room, by the window, Gulabi had prepared an armchair with a soft round
pillow with a hole in the middle. It looked like the English letter O.
It was supposed to ease Jharna Begum’s sore bottom when she sat there to
enjoy her garden. But, as mentioned earlier, the woman didn’t feel at
all ‘under the weather’. On the contrary, she felt incredibly fit and
well.
Out she would come from that dreary room. Out she would be in the
open air. And so she did, amidst protests and knitted eyebrows. Only
when she needed to break wind or breast-feed the baby, did she seek out a
private corner.
Hadi, Jami, Sami and Sadi, the four brothers who had missed their
mother terribly during the previous nine months, and before that, those
seven weeks with the seven special Thursdays, encircled her as soon as
she came out of the room. They did not show much interest in the strange
creature in their mother’s arms. One of them had a bunch of flowers,
one had a ring made of hay straw, the third one had written down a verse
from the Quran in black elegant calligraphy, and the fourth one had
painted a picture of the setting sun on the river that flowed behind
their house. These they presented to their mother.
Hadi, the oldest son, whose voice was breaking, murmured embarrassedly, “Ammu!” and gave her the bunch of flowers.
“Here, you’ve a ring, made by myself,” said the second one.
“It’s boring to sleep without having recited the suras (Quranic
verses) with you,” declared the third and stretched out his gift.
“I’ve painted a picture for you,” announced the little one.
Jharna Begum dried a trembling drop of a tear with the back of her
hand. Then she gave Daria to Gulabi, and took all her four sons in her
arms; she embraced them, fondled them, showered kisses on them, ruffled
their hair, crumpled their ironed shirts and murmured tender words.
That evening they all sat on low-legged stools around the low dining
table to celebrate this family reunion. Daria was fast asleep in a
wicker cradle that hung from the ceiling. The room was lit up with the
yellowish light of a hurricane lamp that stood in the centre of the
table. An imposing number of insects buzzed around the lamp like a live
halo. Around this halo were porcelain bowls, set in a wider circle. They
were filled with delicacies like hens in almond sauce, spicy wild duck,
ruhufish chops and lobster in coconut milk. There were also various
accompaniments like tamarind pickles, coriander chutney and green
mangoes. The unusual dishes, which the cook had got used to preparing to
gratify Jharna Begum’s pregnant palate, were no longer there. Neither was the silverfish dish. Truly, none was missed by anyone. A cat circled
and purred under the table — its black back arching, its tongue licking
its own mouth. Perhaps it missed the familiar fish-smell.
Who knows?
Every now and then its furry tail brushed several pairs of knees. The
walls were embraced by the shadows here and there and a blend of aromas
crowded inside a few pairs of expectant nostrils. Laughter and jovial
voices were heard for a long time in that room.
But the following day the mood of the family was subdued. From early
in the morning neighbours lined up to congratulate Jharna Begum and also
to take a look at the newborn. Even though grandmother Salma Begum and
Gulabi made a real effort to conceal the child’s hair by putting a hat
on her head, one could yet catch sight of one or two glittering curls
that rebelliously crawled out from beneath the edge of the hat, which in
its turn brought out plenty of improbable comments from the hearts of
the baffled visitors. “By, Allah. It can’t be a human child,” said
someone.
“No, an angel,” someone answered, “I wonder if she has wings under the clothes!”
“Did you hear that the midwife wet herself while delivering the poor
child?” exclaimed someone else. “Tauba” (a slap on the right cheek; an
act that normally accompanies the word to ward off the evil eye).
“Tauba!” (A slap on the left cheek.) “Did you see her hair? It was all silver!”
“Oh, Allah, we knew it.”
“Her mother had conceived her by using paranormal methods.”
“She shouldn’t have defied God’s wish.”
“Didn’t we say it?”
“Poor, poor child!” Much as one avoided explaining the import of
these pitiful words, it was all very simple. Such a vile incident at the
onset of one’s life could only mean a pitiable life.
A bad sign!
An unlucky child!
Still Jharna Begum held her head high. It seemed she didn’t care what
the people were saying. She went on talking, greeting and smiling her
radiant smiles. Later, perhaps, she would think about these, but now her
face betrayed none of her feelings. One of the maids picked her way
through the crowd with a silver tray with a plate of dates and jar of
cold lemon sherbet in her hands. The visitors helped themselves, casting
furtive glances at the neonate. If they could’ve x-rayed with their
eyes they would certainly have penetrated the hat to see the whole head.
But this was not the case. They were to see only one or two silvery
curls.
Nothing more. During the course of the day they came and went at will.
Like cats.
Azad Chaudhury worried about Jharna Begum’s apparent sedateness and
the outcome of it. He admired her patience, but at the same time he
again became aware of the growing weeds in his brain; hairy weed, itchy
weed, poisonous weed. All his thoughts and feelings were muddled. He
looked at his wife, the way she walked, held her head, the baby with
silver curls in her arms — everything made him uneasy. He watched people
come and go, he watched his daughter, two soft silver curls crawling
out from under the pink hat, and suddenly made up his mind to forbid
curious neighbours on the premises for a while. Salma Begum prayed
silent prayers and Gulabi put a round kajal mark, as big as a pea on the
forehead of the child to ward off the evil eye.
During the following few days the rumour spread like vapour; permeating
every leak, every crack, making way, touring, detouring to every
household of the little village of Gulab Ganga. It said that Jharna
Begum had given birth to a silver-haired fairy child. But, unfortunately
the midwife had befouled the baby. As the rumour travelled from mouth to mouth several other embellishments were added to it.
Many incredible qualities were ascribed to Jharna Begum. While some
continued avoiding the sight of her as if she were a witch, others began
to treat her as a saint and claimed that she could solve their
problems, cure their ailments, enrich their harvest etc. Queues were
established in front of the gate, children climbed up the high wall and
the high trees around it to get a glimpse of the saintly mother and her
divine child.
It was a sheer circus; the beggars gathered to get an extra coin, the
vendors crowded in the hope of good business, children frisked about, and the old ones recited verses from the Holy Scripture.
Meanwhile, inside the big walls the little girl grew and transformed
into a very ordinary child. Her hair had been shaved off and buried
under the jasmine bush together with the umbilical cord. But the stubs
of her new hair shifted colour. It grew dark and darker. Black with a
luminous shade of purple-blue. Like a raven’s wing in the sun. And the
violet of her eyes became coffee brown, dark brown, not quite black.
And by the seventh day, when there was to be a religious ceremony to
give her a name, she had turned into a perfectly normal baby girl with
perfectly normal features.
It was a Thursday. The Imam was the first to arrive there. With him
he had a miniature copy of the holy Quran wrapped in a velvet cover, and
a large knife. Polished and sharpened. Two fattened goats had been
waiting to be slaughtered by this knife on this day. The Imam performed
the task in the name of God in the yard in betweenthe kitchen and
dwelling house. The goats were flayed and the good meat was divided into
three mounds, the same amount in each. Three meat-mounds: one for the
poor ones, one for the relatives and one for the day’s feast. The last
mound was prepared on open fire with a fine mixture of spices. Rice was
boiled in young green bamboo reeds. Parathas were fried, ducks were
grilled, rashgullahas and steamed curd were purchased.
Two colourful party-tents were set up in the garden; one for the
males and one for the females and children. Gas lanterns were hung in
the four corners of each tent. One special platform was raised for the
Imam to lead the religious part of the occasion. A dozen men milled
about hurrying, scurrying and getting things ready.
Some set the tables,
some arranged the chairs, and some swept the ground.
It was a warm afternoon. Neither torturing hot, nor pressing. Pleasant.
A wind blew.
A warm and nice river-wind.
Gulabi brought the little girl out when the sun had sunk in the west,
and the sky was yellowish like water with a dash of turmeric, in the
dull glow of its last rays. The baby was dressed in a chalk-white frock
and a pair of white socks. Her scalp, which was now bare of hair, was
topped with a laced-edged hat. From under the serrated edge of her hat,
her two dark eyes looked curiously around. Around her soft neck, hung a
garland of garlic cloves.
Gulabi walked past the gathering crowds to hand the girl to Azad
Chaudhury. He took the baby, and went up two steps to the Imam who was
sitting in the middle of the dais. By then, the guests were divided into
two groups according to gender — each standing on either side of the
parapet, listening to the Imam. Sitting on the dais, he read aloud a few
selected verses from his Quran in the velvet coat, and then proclaimed
firmly how very important it was for every Muslim to carry a name
denoting his or her religious and ethnic origin.
These were all very
familiar words to the listeners, but still they couldn’t help but feel
the solemnity of the moment as people always do on such occasions. It
was all very quiet but for the Imam’s grave voice.
The child in Azad Chaudhury’s arms dozed off, but the function
proceeded as planned. All suggested names were painted in different
colours on a wicker-tray that was set in front of the Imam. By each name
a candle was lit. Above, in the evening sky, the fair moon had become a
little brighter by then and the stars shone like tinsel. As the candles
melted, everyone made the utmost effort to catch sight of the tray;
some stood on tiptoe, some asked the person in front to make a little
room, someone else very simply took a chair or a stool and stood on it.
They held their breath with eyes fixed on the candles. The twelve
candles burnt, wax melted, wicks shrunk, smoke rose. The Imam’s face
bent over the tray and took on a reddish tint. Candles began to go out.
One after another. Slowly but surely they flickered and died in
succession till only one was left. It stood there now dwarfed and fat,
but still burning, illuminating the name ‘Daria’.
Jharna Begum’s face shone with delight, caught by the golden
moon-dust-light. Long before Daria’s birth, during those magical
mornings, she had decided to call her daughter Daria, for the word daria
meant river. Daria was a child of the river, a water child. And, her
own name, Jharna, meant source, fountain. Jharna, the source. Daria, the
river.

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