Tales for Delicious Girls by Barbora Knobova l Q&A + Blog Tour + Giveaway

Joining us today is Barbora Knobova, author of the relationship book Tales for Delicious Girls. We interviewed Barbora about her book in November, now I’d like to ask her a few relationship questions and, as an added bonus, Barbora will be giving away an autographed copy of her book to one lucky person who leaves either a relationship comment or question or writes “I love Tales for Delicious Girls” in the comment section below. Details follow her interview.

Thank you so much for this interview, Barbora, and welcome back to The Writer’s Life!

Thank you very much. It's great to be here again!


My first question of the day is how would you describe a ‘delicious girl’?

Actually, the word "Delicious" is an acronym: Daring, Enchanting, Loving, Inspiring, Captivating, Intriguing, Outgoing, Unique, Sophisticated. A Delicious Girl is a woman who loves herself and puts her own happiness and well-being first. A woman who knows how to cater to her own needs in order to be able to love, accept love and be there for others.


Other than yourself, can you name a few ‘delicious girls’ you have met in the past and what makes them ‘delicious’?

All of my friends and my mum. Strong, empowered women who make this world a better place to be just by being themselves.


Can a guy be ‘delicious’?

Definitely. Many women think that there are no good men left in today's world but the truth is there are many delicious guys out there. Every man who is able to love a woman truly, without competing with her and without boosting his ego by making her feel miserable, is a delicious guy.


Do you think guys are intimidated by delicious girls or, in fact, that’s what kind of dream girl they are really after?

I think it really depends. Many men are intimidated by "delicious girls" and many men find them challenging. Many of them are attracted to delicious girls but their ego is too fragile and they're not able to live with their delicious girl once they find her. But let's face it - a delicious girl usually knows what's good for her and looks for a balanced, loving and caring delicious man :)


On to a relationship question, why do you believe women choose deadbeats – is it perhaps because love knows no boundaries or is it an inner quest that the female is not aware of to save this person and if this last answer is correct, why do women do this?

Yes, unfortunately there are many women who consciously or subconsciously choose deadbeats, losers or abusive types (and of course there are men who choose such women too). It's not healthy and usually there is a pattern hidden behind this type of relationship behavior. A childhood pattern, a trauma, lack of self-esteem, fear, and so on. It's very self-destructive but the good news is that it can be dealt with.

Tales for Delicious Girls encourages women to be their own best friend, something I truly believe is vital to the well-being of anyone, but how to do teach someone to respect and appreciate themselves when they don’t know the first step to take?

It can be very difficult but I usually recommend starting with the following exercise: Write down all the negative beliefs and affirmations that you keep repeating to yourself. Then turn them around and make them positive. (For example: I'm stupid and impossible - I'm smart and empowered. I never meet my soulmate - I'm a true guy magnet). Take the new positive affirmations and create your personal mantra. Keep it in your journal and read it aloud at least three times a day - in the morning before you get up, at lunch time and before you go to sleep in the evening. It is a very powerful tool that you can use to change your attitude to yourself. It usually takes 21-30 days to reprogram your brain and start believing and feeling your new affirmations.


What are your views about women and men living together before they marry or instead of marriage ?

It is very individual. I know people who would never live with their partner and have children without being married, and I know couples who love each other and their children very much and have a very happy family without being married. If a relationship is based on a solid foundation, marriage is not indispensable. On the other hand, getting married won't save any relationship and won't change a relationship that doesn't work. And marriage won't prevent your partner from leaving you. It really depends on what you want, prefer and believe in. The most important thing is the quality of the relationship, not marriage as an institution. Marriage is simply something you and your partner either choose or not.


Do you think men are scared of women who are intellectually smart?

Not all guys are scared of smart women, and I believe that most guys are not. Men who are scared of intelligent, educated women usually have low self-esteem or follow a subconscious pattern or are influenced by the way they were brought up. If you are a woman and attract such guys, you need to work on yourself to find out why you attract them if you want to change your dating experience.


If someone were to walk up to you and ask how do they find Mr. Right, what would you say to them?

First, work on yourself and your self-love. If you don't love yourself, why should anyone else love you? If you don't enjoy your own company, why should a man enjoy being with you? The relationship that we have with ourselves becomes reflected in our relationships with men. Decide what you really want. And I don't mean a fancy wedding with a man with blue eyes :) Think about what you want your partner to be like, how you would like to spend time with him, what you would like to share with him, etc. Write it down and make your list as detailed as possible. Review it from time to time - we change, our lives change and our ideas of a perfect partner change too. If your type hasn't changed since high school, it's time for you to find a new type.


Is there a secret to keeping a relationship long term? Not saying there are no problems, but they seem to just work it out and continue to love one another as the years pass. What do you believe that secret is?

I believe two things are crucial. One, it's important to have something in common. A hobby that you share. A new activity that you take up together. Play golf, learn a new language, share books. Even if it was just one thing, you will always have something to talk about, and that's very important in a long-term relationship. Two, keep your passion alive, work on your sexual chemistry. If you don't know how, hire a coach or attend a course together (Loveology University offers some great courses and resources for couples and individuals).


Thank you so much for this interview, Barbora! We look forward to hearing more of your relationship advice. Is there a website where we can find out more about you and your book, Tales for Delicious Girls?

Thank you very much! My website is http://www.barbora-knobova.com. In a couple of days I'm also launching Delicious Path, a personal development website for women: http:///www.DeliciousPath.com.


We're having a giveaway! Leave a comment or a question for Barbora between now and January 22 and you could be the winner of an autographed copy of her new book, Tales for Delicious Girls! Or simply write "I love Tales for Delicious Women!" in the comment section!

Only those leaving email addresses with their comment or question qualifies.

The winner will be announced on Jan. 25.

Good luck!
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